En Garde! Vigo's return.

En Garde! Vigo's return.

For the eighth game of my En Garde campaign I returned again to the DVD of the classic Flashing Blade series.  Our badly dubbed hero is confronted by the Forces of Spanish Righteousness, and a chase through the woods reminiscent of a Benny Hill sequence takes place before he is nabbed.

I'll have none of that!

 In my narrative the Chevalier is milling around in the courtyard with the French Musketeers, whilst the interminable Peace Conference continues indoors.

Captain Diego Vigo Alatriste and his Spanish Tercio troops appear at the roadway; proper professional soldiers these boys.

It's going to be a fight in the courtyard, and Vigo has lost none of the sword skills that have killed so many Frenchmen (and orcs) over the years.

Using their matchlock men at the wall the Spanish fire into the garden, whilst Vigo athletically vaults the wall and starts running his point through assorted Frenchmen.

Once again the Bladé uses three attack and two defence counters (although I simply choose different coloured dice to be honest)  Once again the Chevalier's sword work is poor, and overall the Musketeers are struggling.

Whilst his faithful manservant battles the Spanish Tercio troops on the right, the Chevalier gets stuck into Vigo, something of a bold move I fear.   One of the French Sergeants also engages the Spaniard using the stock of his matchlock.  Vigo's three strikes are sufficient to kill the Sergeant and to cause the Flashing Blade to throw down his weapon in surrender.

Will the Bladé escape the Spaniards?  Will Vigo ever be beaten?  Has this Flashing Bladé guy any honour at all?   Don't miss episode 9, "the Bladé wears Tights?"

Kingmaker Cyprus to the end of Turn One

Game One

In the previous game moves in this turn a skirmish between the House of Roland and the House of Richard saw Sir Piers kill Sir Richard in single combat and the destruction of Sir Richard’s forces.   
Having won the battle Sir Roland's crown deck draw was "Turkish Mercenaries," in the form of Amin Yashed and his Turkopoles.

Sir Gilbert’s Turn

Gilbert draws mercenaries go home, crossbowmen.  Unfortunately for him he has a mercenary crossbow company in his retinue.  He waves from the battlements as they march away unpaid.
Gilbert is out on the peninsula, and blocked away from the action by Sir Gaston, but Gaston has a powerful faction and controls Kantara as well as Famagusta blocking any moves Gilbert could take.  I decided that Gilbert will bide his time, but that he must hate Sir Gaston.
From the crown deck Gilbert draws a sacred Relic, "The Mummified Penis of St Donald," an artifact known as the “Trump” for the strange sounds it is said to make in the presence of non believers in the path to God St Donald demands of us all.  A History of the “Trump” is available in the giftshop of Gilbert’s Castle at Caparso, for only five white bezants.

Sir Gaston’s turn

Gaston has a very powerful faction, rivalling Sir Roland and Sir Conrad in terms of power.  There are however some problems.  He has a hostile Sir Gilbert at his back, and is far from Nicosia and the scene of the action.
He draws “Skirmish:  Bloodbath” as his event. 
My problem is, who will he go after?  He can`t get to Nicosia this turn, and if he leaves his holdings in the East of the Island Gilbert will attack in his absence.  Clearly the presence of a powerful religious relic nearby has to sway him.  It seems clear then that as Sir Gilbert is moving the artefact, under guard, between his castle and the town in the valley below, Sir Gaston decides to attack and grasp the Holy Penis of St Donald.  After all such an important relic would be better protected by the House of Gaston.

Gaston takes his retinue to the town of Carpaso, in the valley, with the castle of Sir Gilbert on the hill behind.
Sir Gilbert brings out his retinue and the “Bloodbath” begins.

Knights Characters
Sir Gilbert is Insipid.  Units within 12cm get no courage bonus
Sir Roger is Sly and may refuse challenges without penalty

Sir Gaston is Rash  a “Wild Charger.”  This could be an issue!
Sir Gunther is Strong.  May reroll one hit dice

Retinues: 
Sir Gilbert
• 2 Mounted Men-at-Arms* @ 12 points  (dismounted for this game)
• 1 Mounted Serjeants @ 4 points
• 2 Foot Serjeants @ 4 Points
• 1 Wagon with praying monks: Brother Belcher and Friar Farte.   
(1 Crossbowmen@4 points have deserted on a "Mercenaries go home card)

Sir Gaston
• 2 Mounted Men-at-Arms* @ 12 points
• 1 Mounted Serjeants @ 4 points
• 1 Foot Serjeants @ 4 Points
• 1 Crossbowmen @ 4 points
• 1 Bidower Skirmishers @ 2 points

The Boasts
Sir Gaston boasts that "half the enemy shall fall to my swords"
Sir Gilbert boasts "Every blade shall be drawn."

The Game


Bloodbath is a straightforward line theup and let them go scenario.   My terrain here is a little too green for Cyprus, but I didn`t realise that until I saw the pictures.  The fields and crops are printed onto T shirt  transfers and then ironed onto the felt.

 Lining them up on the baseline was a bit of a squeeze, but then Gaston took off, his rash character ensuring that his personal unit moved each time.

That group of spearmen under the blue banner never made it off the baseline.

Sir Gunther leads his Serjents on a wide flanking run, but is intercepted by Sir Roger.   Gunther proves better at fighting and kills two of Roger's men, throwing him back.  Roger fails the command test and runs away.

Sir Gaston brings both of his Men at Arms into a wild charge, shattering the spearmen in the centre of Gilbert's line.

Looking at the photo I noticed that I gave Gilbert the de Luisignan banners of blue and white stripes for this game.  Patriotism... the last refuge of the scoundrel.

Gaston breaks the dismounted Men at Arms with his charge, whilst the Serjents under Sir Gunther turn their flank.

A neat victory.  Sir Gaston's boast that half the enemy shall fall to my swords earns him two glory points.  Sir Gilbert's boast "Every blade shall be drawn." actually earns him one point., but Sir Gilbert throws down his sword and is taken prisoner.

I determined that Gilbert would offer the Constable of the Castle of Famagusta. (turned down on a d6 roll of 1) He then added his position as Treasurer of Cyprus.  (Accepted on a roll of 5)  He must aslo surrender the Holy Mummified Penis artifact.
Sir Gilbert is free, but effectively ruined for some time to come.

Sir Gaston draws "Mercenary Foot Serjents" from the crown pack.  He is building his forces nicely.


Sir Conrad’s  turn.  Sly old Conrad does some politicking
He draws “marriage to an heiress” as an event.
Conrad holds the Archbishop of Nicosia card, (it’s his Uncle)  He offers to crown the bastard as king of Cyprus, by his marriage into and alliance with the House of Roland.  He demands as a trade the d`Ibelin card, in effect making Conrad Count of Lefkara, one of the highest cards I have in play.  Sir Roland agrees (2d6 and he rolled a 9, it’s high enough, and this is all part of Roland’s plan)
As Count of Lefkara and of Lemesos Conrad now controls the southern half of the Island.

Conrad takes his retinue to Nicosia to join his new allies.
The Coronation takes place in the Parliament phase, and there are no other Royal counters in play.

God Save King Piers the Bastard, King of Cyprus.

God Save Sir Roland too... if he can get away with this one it will truly be a miracle.

En Garde! The Bladé and the Camp Ambassador

The Bladé and the Camp Ambassador

The Flashing Blade has learned of the Papal Nuncio's top secret peace negotiations with the Spanish Ambassador, at a house somewhere in Savoy.  The Chevalier invades the grounds, sets off a battle between the Papal guards and the Savoyards, and generally ruins the proceedings.

Having re-watched the Flashing Blade TV series as "research" I was quite amazed at how much it differed from my childhood memories of the show.  Yes the Flashing Blade is still a glorious heroic idiot, but it seems to me that the "peace talks" take up a huge quantity of screen time.  The participants are all camp, some to a huge degree, and the "love story" is also, I`m sorry to say, high camp.  From a lot of sword fighting in the first few shows we gradually fall into a series of long winded and very camp Ambassadorial negotiations.  I think its all meant to be a French homage to Cardinal Mazarin, who is the Papal Nuncio.  Very strange... still it had a great theme tune!


There is also the fact that in the later episodes the Blade himself hides from the Spanish by joining a travelling theatre group, and dons stripy tights to play Scaramouche.   The writers had no shame!  A masterful disguise though since he neglects to wear the mask!  It doesn't get much more camp than stripy tights on a man with that sixties hairdo, especially if he calls himself the Flashing Bladé.


If you intended to re-watch the Flashing Blade and I`ve spoiled the plot for you I can only point out, in my defence, that it makes no sense anyway, and I`ve saved you a fiver for the DVD.

The Game

The negotiations in full flow.

My Papal Nuncio is the Cardial Richelieu figure from Old Glory, most of my En Garde! figures are from this source.

The French Musketeers have an uneasy truce with the Savoyards guarding the Ambassador.

 The arrival of the Bladé sparks an argument.  Swords are drawn.

...and a huge melee breaks out.

Please note that the Chevalier is still rolling abysmal dice whilst faithful Lurkio hops over the wall and drives his way forward.

 Good parrying from the Bladé, but he should over match this Savoyard Musketeer easily.

Lurkio breaks into the peace negotiations, and delivers some exposition, "Castle... under siege... Spanish are the baddies..."

We know that the Nuncio has a thing for Lurkio from previous games.  He rolls 2 x 6 and gets a 12.  Lurkio is in luck!  "Put your chocolate balls away, you are trying to spoil us..." he tells the Ambassador in a heavilly dubbed Italian accent.

The fighting is dying down.  really difficult to keep track of but the French still have four Musketeers standing, and the remaining Savoy boys surrender.  Amazingly the Bladé  is still alive.

Four Musketeers?  Surely not.

The Papal Nuncio asks the Bladé to travel to the French frontier and bring back a signed order from the double dealing Duke of Savoy that will allow him to break the siege.

He warns the Bladé that the Spanish will try to stop him, and that means Diego Vigo Alatriste, from whom our hero only escaped last time by ending the episode, cheating and stretching the TV viewers credulity.  He may need to seek out those travelling players and the stripy tights pretty quickly!