The Chronicle of The Sid, Count of Benidorm...
The PrologueSpain... one thousand and eighty years
after the coming of Christ.
It is a war-torn, unhappy land...
half Christian, half Moor.
This is the time, and the story
of the Sid of Benidorm
Hollywood script intro over, let's get on with Outremer Faith and Blood.
King Alonso the Twisted of Aragon has granted the title Count of Benidorm to one of his old mates, Sid, marrying him off to the Dowager Aunt Joan. Alonso doesn't own these lands, the Umayyads do. Worse, the actual Cid, Charlton of Heston, now holds Valencia as it's Prince, and is technically our Sid's boss.
With less than a dozen men the Sid must conquer the Benidorm resort before his wedding, one bar at a time.
Scenario One
The Palm Beach
Scenario Two
Sol Pelicanos Oca
Scenario Three
The Benidorm Plaza.
The Christians
Sid Count of Benidorm
Big Bernardo his Squire and Best man
Jim of Dale, Soldier
The Peasants
Hawtrey, Williams, Howerd, Cribbins, Pertwee,
Butterworth, Monkhouse, Clary, Old Hartnell
The Moors
Al Alanus Rickmans Emir of Benidorm
Kenni, The Khasi of the Solana.
Yousef Ben Lom
Gimp the archer, Atiq the arrow, Hamid the spear, Shiraj the scimitar, Jabir the jabber.
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| The Moors deploy, but only fate knows where the Christians will appear from. |
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| Point 3 as it turns out. Lots of angry mounted Spaniards. |
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| The Sid and his mates. |
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| The Emir comes forward to fight. |
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| And Gimp the archer draws a bead on the Spaniards below. |
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| A Hollywood melee as they mix it up. |
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| The Spanish divide and circle the building. |
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| The melee goes against the Moors |
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| Even after Shiraj the Scimitar goes in on foot, it's all a losing cause. |
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| As Yusuf Ben Lom fights a rearguard the Emir flees. |
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| Gimp and his boys fail morale and give it up. |
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| But the Emir will live to fight again. |
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